at a cafe in barcelona couple of weeks ago:

A Spanish couple sitting next to me, a young couple. around late 20s. she's skinny skinny, cute brunette, hes …well kinda big. don't see how ppl can be attracted when they look so different but i guess thats the thing about love, isn't it? that it really isn't about the appearance . at all. its all about  how the other person makes u feel. its that kind of feeling like u can be urself no matter how u feel about urself or what mood ur in. the other person loves u no matter what. every couple (well the woman) that I've asked how they knew that he was the one they all had the same answer; ”he makes me laugh. no matter what, he always makes me laugh. every single day.” making the other person laugh, r laughing together about something small or big, seems to be the key to a healthy and happy relationship. because if u cant laugh together, then whats the point of being together in the first place? that has been the case for me with my 2 exes. we didn't have the humor. at all. everytime my first boyfriend laughed about something or made a joke, i was like, huh? i don't get it. and then everytime i made a joke or was trying to be funny in an ironic way he would just look at me with the same expression that i had when i didn't get his jokes. so no big hit there (alltho we were together for almost 3 years so thats kind of impressing i would say. ok, it was in high school, but still…)and my second boyfriend didn't either share my kind of ironic humor or appreciated my extremely bad jokes which i couldn't really understand how he couldn't get my sense of humor..cus i of course thought i was hilarious. it was actually the same thing when i was little and I made , well actually really bad jokes that i found hilarious and absolutely no one laughed. and then i mean, no one. silence. big time. but i laughed so much so at least I had fun=) I've actually tried every guy that I've dated recently to see if we have the same kind of humor. but nope. they never laugh. don't know if I'm really terrible at making jokes (its not really my strong side…) but still…they could at least fake it. or maybe not when I think about it. faking humor is prob really bad, because if u feel that u have to fake it, then u know ur relationship won't last that long. so its better to figure it out in the beginning. cus then at least u know that u don't share the same sense of humor and then u can move on. 

so during my dating time, (so since the age of 16 maybe) ive dated alot of different kinds of guys (Chinese, French, Australian, Argentinian, Italian, Swedish...) and no one and then i mean none of the guys have had the same kind of humor as I. which has led to very awkward moments. me trying to be funny (which never really works for me, would looove to be funny and be able to make really funny jokes but its just not one one of my strongest saides unfortunately....but u cant have all can u) and the guy having this strange expression on his face, looking at me like, huuuuh? and then i have to explain the joke and then the moment is gone...and vice versa too...its just not...working, humour wise, for me. or maybe i just havent found the One yet...=)

maybe its the story of my life...being really awkward with guys...or having awkward moments with guys. maybe i should just stop trying to be funny. 

ive dated in periods. always been a " periodare" which basically means u do stuff very intensely for a period of time and then u stop and u dont do it for a while and then all of a sudden u start doing that again (whatever it may be). and ive been like that with everything basically in my life. with doing art, with writing, with moving around, trying new stuff. and with guys. and the last time i dated was in March this year which isnt that long time ago...but really, ALL the guys that ive dated has either had no sense of humor or just not MY kind of humor. dont know which one is worst=)

and since im a "periodare" i guess i will see when the next guy will enter my life. im just crossing my finger that it will be it this time. and that he will have the same kind of humor as me. cus else...i will stay single for as longest as i can do it...

anyway, hope you all will have an amamzing friday and an amamzing week end!

here are some photos from this summer so far.

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